What Really Matters

"I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails.

I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the tires from taking kids to scout camp. I want to be there with grass stains on my shoes from mowing Sister Schenk's lawn. I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbor's children.

I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone's garden. I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder.

I want the Lord to know I was really here and that I really lived."

Marjorie Pay Hinckley

Love this woman. LOVE this quote.


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Vulnerable

I hate that being a woman makes me vulnerable.

Don't get me wrong; I love being a woman. But I do wish that some things were different.

This morning I was out walking with The Bug and I was stopped by an older gentleman. His teeth were yellowed and rotting and he kept smiling at me as he struck up a conversation. I tried several times to end the conversation and keep walking, but he would follow me and continue talking. I had an uncomfortable feeling about the situation, but I felt so mean just walking away from him. In the end I decided that he was most likely just a lonely man who wanted someone to talk to.





Do you see my predicament? I wanted to be able to stop and just listen to how he had polio as a child and all the food he can't eat now and the medicine he's taking...but there was a slight possibility that I could have been putting myself and my son in danger. A friendly conversation could very quickly have become very threatening.

I want to be able to assume that everyone has good intentions. I would love to be able to pull over when I see someone having car trouble, or pick up a hitch hiker, but it's just not safe. Where do I draw that line?

I'm grateful for the men who protect us and take care of us. I love it when The Mr. pulls over and helps someone in trouble when we're on the road, because I wish I could do that.



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Superwomen

I spent last evening having a much needed discussion with my sister-in-law. I came home so energized and uplifted, that the Mr. kept asking me why on earth I was so happy. I thrive on deep, meaningful conversations.

I grew up with five brothers. My mom and I got along great, but I never had the sister bonding experience. I also never realized the importance of other women in my life. What a power we have to lift each other up!

I have felt at times that I should stay away from other women because when we get together there is a tendency to gossip, backbite, and judge people. I think very few women are actually malicious; it is simply our nature (or at least mine) to analyze EVERYTHING and gather information. So many well-intended conversations end up with poison laced throughout. I believe this is Satan's tool. Both the gossiping itself and the idea that exclusion is the higher road.

The truth is we need each other. The truth is that if we make an effort to speak positively and use our words, experiences, and nature to uplift, the potential for doing good is limitless. I am so grateful for a friend who was willing to speak candidly with me in order to help me through a rough spot in my life. I think that every woman needs to hear that they are not alone; they are not an anomoly, and they are not broken. Other women all over the world are experiencing similar trials, frustrations, and yes, we can even talk about joys! The purpose of life is not to shimmy through completely unscathed--it is to LEARN! So if you are struggling, congratulations! And welcome to life. Chances are you don't need a pill, a counselor, or a new spouse. You need to get down on your knees. At least that is what we talked about last night (don't worry, Dear, a new husband was never an option. I'm afraid you're stuck with me).

Summary: Women are wonderful, beautiful people. There is a reason we were created differently than men. We have certain gifts, and our nature is to nurture. So go tap in to that nature and put your arm around someone and tell them they are not alone.


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